We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
