just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
