Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
