i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
