are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
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