I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
