It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
