My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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