There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize