i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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