I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
