you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Randomize