What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
