He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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