Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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