i think i have herpe
just one?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
