i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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