So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize