As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
