Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
