I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
