Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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