Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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