yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
