Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
You ruined the universe
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
