she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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