woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
So much rum. So many feels.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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