I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
