That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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