What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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