Fuck appropriateness.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
