I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
