Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
