haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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