she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
