I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
She even gives head with a lisp.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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