I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
