I'm gonna have a badass scar
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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