Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
