"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
