Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
We need to get me chipped asap
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
