You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I deserve this hangover.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
