watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
