I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
