how can u be prego again
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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