Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I could fuck to npr.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
