I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
