woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
