Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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