Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I FOUND THE LEGS
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
